Patricia Stoltey

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J is for Journal: My A to Z Wish List

April 11, 2012 By: Patricia

I wish I had consistently kept journals over the years…and never thrown one away. My history is in bits and pieces, some stashed in files containing handwritten letters, some in notebooks, a little bit in bad poetry and essays.

During some part of my childhood I kept a diary. I have no idea what happened to it. A couple of years ago, three or four letters I had written a friend when I was a high school sophomore were produced by the friend. They were revealing, and a little embarrassing. My handwriting was atrocious, my spelling not much better, and I wrote mostly about boys.

There’s a folder containing letters from two wise uncles (my dad’s brothers) who wanted to show their moral support during a very rough time in my life, but I don’t have copies of the letters I wrote to them.

I have copies of most of the letters I wrote to my mother during the two years I lived in the South of France, although I think they read more like a travelogue than a journal.

There are two notebooks containing my feeble attempts at keeping morning pages, the primary activity I took away from Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way. The notebooks are not even close to being filled. I think I have an aversion to writing about my feelings.

There’s one notebook where I kept notes on my trip to Norway and a driving trip my husband and I took through several countries in Europe. Some of those entries are entertaining, but not terribly introspective.

And the poetry and essays? Most of those have a date with the shredder.

If you don’t keep journals now, I recommend you begin. Someday you’ll be my age and wish you had a better grasp of your own history and what you were thinking back when. It’s surprising how much we forget along the way.

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Comments

  1. Medeia Sharif says

    April 12, 2012 at 3:29 am

    I kept a diary from childhood up till my early twenties, then I kept one sporadically. Also, I threw out and shredded my journals ages ago. Now I sometimes ask myself how I felt at a certain moment of my life and I can’t recall.

  2. Patricia Stoltey says

    April 11, 2012 at 3:22 pm

    So it appears I’m not the only one who wishes she’d kept journals…

    On the other hand, after reading Stephanie and Jemi’s comments, perhaps it’s just as well I kept my inner thoughts and feelings to myself. ๐Ÿ˜€

  3. Jemi Fraser says

    April 11, 2012 at 2:36 pm

    I kept a journal in high school/college. I remember vividly burning them all in a bonfire one night! ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. Lynn Proctor says

    April 11, 2012 at 12:15 pm

    you are blessed to have kept them–wish i had–of some of the years:)

  5. Stephanie V says

    April 11, 2012 at 10:43 am

    Like yours, my journal attempts have been in fits and starts. No ongoing success. What happens for me is that I read some old fragments that I have – yes, I did the morning journaling, too – and it’s too silly. Or it’s meaningless after so many years. Or I don’t even know why I wrote what i did. I’m pretty sure by now that my deeper feelings aren’t something I want to share.

  6. Jacqueline Seewald says

    April 11, 2012 at 9:14 am

    I tossed some of my early journals and regret doing so.

  7. Patricia Stoltey says

    April 11, 2012 at 8:37 am

    Margot, journals would certainly help me write a little history for my kids.

    Karen, you did a very wise thing to hold on to those journals.

  8. Karen Walker says

    April 11, 2012 at 6:19 am

    I have all my journals since 1978, when I started keeping them. I am so glad I saved those even when I got rid of everything else in my life. Twice.
    karen

  9. Margot Kinberg says

    April 11, 2012 at 6:02 am

    Pat – Journals really are interesting and such rich ways to connect with our younger selves. Lots of historians use them too to do their research. What a neat addition to this theme….

Meet Patricia

I read, I write, I blog, and sometimes I do the laundry and cook. My 2014 novel, Dead Wrong, was a finalist in the thriller category of the 2015 Colorado Book Awards. Wishing Caswell Dead (Five Star/Cengage, December 20, 2017) is a historical mystery set in 1830s Illinois in the fictitious Village of Sangamon. The novel was a finalist for the 2018 Colorado Book Awards for General Fiction. My most recent release, In Defense of Delia (Five Star/Cengage, November 2022), is available in hardcover and will soon be available in ebook and trade paperback. Read Moreโ€ฆ

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